@ErrataRob — most inept bully ever

By now, most people have heard that Kathy Sierra — @seriouspony — has bowed out of Twitter. The only version of events that most folk are likely to read about is that @ErrataRob did it. Rob did it, you see, to defend Weev’s honor. Kevin Mitnick made an appearance to be creepy as fsck for good measure.

(Insert “allegedly” as appropriate above)

I won't playback the timeline — you can read plenty about it on Twitter.

UPDATE: Since this was written both Kathy and Rob have posted more on the situation.

Kathy — http://www.wired.com/2014/10/trolls-will-always-win/

Rob — http://blog.erratasec.com/2014/10/response-to-kathy-sierra.html

Appropriate disclaimer .. I know Rob, I consider him a good friend. As such, I have a lot of “ErrataRob context” to go by.

So — the thing is — Rob sucks as a bully ..

Clearly though, a lot of people thought Rob was at fault and intentionally set out to cause Kathy Sierra harm. I didn't see it that way — it seemed like a pretty benign conversation with a series of overreactions from many angles coming at Rob. That’s what I saw.

So what other context comes into play for me? I was intently interested in the AT&T vs Weev story. Far less interested in Weev’s other extracurricular activities. Overcriminalization is a concern of mine and I'm not a fan of innuendo-driven reporting. I've also had mind boggling to mind numbing interactions on Twitter where context and intent were ascribed to me that I couldn't even fathom. Likewise, I've evaluated some of my own overly dramatic explosions on Twitter and had to apologize for doing the same thing.

So — no — the thing really is — how can one interact openly and freely without fear of/or recourse if one cannot always know the full context of the person they're talking to?

I had no idea who Kathy Sierra was before this debacle. I certainly didn't know she was intricately encumbered from/to Weev before this. ErrataRob noted he did not either.

If I had known — or, more importantly, if Rob had known — would that have made a difference? I can say with certainty, for myself, not one bit. What would have made a difference is if I knew less of Rob though. If I didn't know him to be empathetic, generous, detail oriented, compartmentalizing, etc. and I had known about Kathy Sierra only .. yeah, Rob would’ve basically been a bloody tool in my eyes.

Judgement is an attractive and bedeviling temptation.

Another likely important fact here is that in my first real interaction with Rob he challenged me with a simple task. He called me out in a sense but he wholly and truthfully called me to task to what he perceived I was saying. (He was right to do so BTW.)

Re-reading what ErrataRob wrote to Kathy Sierra, I can see why he'd stand by his words.

If you’re reaction is to flee, and you have reasons for that reaction — good reasons for yourself — then that is for yourself. Likewise if your reaction is to fight — good reasons for yourself — that is for yourself.

That is reality .. reality isn't turning any comments into something they are not to suite agenda or emotion. How quickly did at least one reader jump to a physical assault analogy reading the previous paragraph I just wrote?

I'd argue there would have to be a pretty clear escalation that had to have taken place before something should be deemed harassment. Or something is suggested a cost of free speech.

Everyone can't be expected to know everyone else’s life context before every interaction. No matter how voluminous The Internet has become.

All this is to (in part) say — don’t escalate mere disagreement to death threats, doxxing, white supremacy, sexism, ..

How about we apply empathy about judgement equally to people we rage-loathe too? Perhaps inquire, from a distance of say beheadings aren’t a risk, as for a clarification? Ignore them and move on? I'm feeling pretty strongly it’s about time those are among the lessons we need to be teaching about bullying.

We would all be happier people for it ..

Footnote: The agony and flat-out terror Kathy Sierra experienced / experiences is not to be dismissed or understated. I’m merely writing on judgement of the interaction between Kathy Sierra and ErrataRob. And hoping, by writing “out loud”, to gain insight on how we improve our communications and happiness in this ever increasingly connected world. Nobody can help find the balance and peace they presumably seek for the likes of Kathy Sierra if “we” are all immediately jumping to escalate judgement elsewhere.

Footnote Too: There is a response worth reading below by @lawduck. I responded alongside there but I’m not sure they’ll appear. Summary line is 1) I am not making an argument against Kathy’s trolling, I’m making an argument that claiming Rob should’ve just taken it all at face value and not argued principles he believes in is absurd. 2) At some point it is trolling to keep insisting people must agree with you (both ways) and stomping off. 3) If Kathy’s context was presumed to be obvious, shouldn't have Rob’s who readily proclaims he’ll play back?

The context you best have history with is the only one you're going to read with. At that point judgement is just a dulling force on your own energy. Learning to ignore is something that is bloody well hard but it’s well past time we start teaching it more instead depending solely on this idea we can moderate all conversation in all forums.